First flight together!

Pit stop in Houston then on to New Orleans for the final drive up to Neshoba County Fair!
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Mississippi Bound

I'll be heading back to Mississippi in the morning for the first time since moving out to Denver.  I realized yesterday that I'll be flying back out here eight  months to the day, when I return to Denver next Wednesday.  To say it out loud, eight months seems like a REALLY long time to not see family but honestly the days, weeks and months have seemed to go by so quickly.  In some regard, it's really not that difficult to go extended time periods without seeing loved ones.  Although, at the same time it is not necessarily good for the soul . . . unless of course you have a tension-driven, drama-field, flat-out bizarre group of family members - which let's be real, most people do! 

Honestly, I am beside myself with anticipation and excitement.  I really never intended to go this long without seeing my sister and niece (and now niece number two, too).  Initially I thought I would be back in Mississippi by March, and then definitely by June and/or in time for the birth of my niece.  Oh but the best laid planes never quite work out do they.  Either way, the reasons I couldn't return were practical and legitimate reasons but regardless I haven't felt bad at all for being gone for eight months.  (With the exception of the day my niece was born, just the actual day and the moments were hard to not be a part of).  But the point I am getting at is that I am okay with having been gone for eight months, I mean I DID move away and I am extremely happy with my decision and have not looked back not one time.  I sincerely want to be here in Colorado and hope that I find full-time, permanent employment soon! 

I am also super excited about the Fair, which I really never planned on the Fair being the first time I see my family so that's like triple excitement because there's a whole other Fair-family that I only see that time of year anyway.  Anticipation is on over-drive, needless to say.  Although, in all sincerity I really am just beside myself to see MP.  I know without a doubt that she's missed me sorely and I have her too.  She's had my heart since March 25, 2003 and she always will. 

Along the same lines of excitement and anticipation, I am simply an emotional wreck this morning.  I have literally been teary-eyed since 7 A.M. and the tears don't seem to be stopping.  (Writing all this down is of course not helping that cause.)  I emotional for a whole host of reasons, I am sure.  MP, I've mentioned, MM of course, and Y naturally. 

Dad is a whole other set of emotions though.  I am bordering on anger really with him but at the same time have of course just missed him.  Although in reality he checked out of my life, (HE- not the other way around) well before my move out here so these emotions aren't anything new with him except that I had prayed that the physical distance would have somehow softened his heart and mind but I have realized in the last few weeks that just isn't the reality.  Which brings me back to anger, more than anything.  I have NO- zero, guilt when it comes to him and I am through trying to make sense of all the unnecessary anger and flat out meanness so wherever that leaves us, I guess is where it is.  Although it is so often over-used and mis-used - It is what it is.  John Prine says it best "you are what you are, and you ain't what you ain't"  I am generally at peace with all the nonsense. 

So excited to see my friends the McCls!!  They are such dear friends and support me more than I even realize, physically, morally, emotionally, literally, all that!  They've all, even the kids, have been a constant in my life for many, many years now (since I was at least 12 I'm thinking) and I just love them so dearly :)  They're the family, I chose- ha!  Of course I love my own family with all of its faults, every member of it from cousins, aunts, uncles, etc.  I have by no means turned away from my blood relatives and do not ever want to give that impression (not sure why I felt the need to clarify that here.)  But the McCls are truly like family in my eyes, and I believe it's mutual.  Not everyone can be so blessed to have a second family and I know I'm fortunate that they are mine! 

THE FAIR, THE FAIR, THE FAIR!!  I had initially planned to try and write a descriptive blog just about the fair and it's uniqueness from my own perspective but then all these silly emotions crept up and today is the first time I've sat down to blog so all the blah, blah crap came first -  my apologies :)  I think for now, since the Fair will definitely be overshadowed here, I will wait and hopefully give more descriptions on what the Fair is to me maybe sometime next week while I'm there.  Hopefully, I'll feel inspired!  Right now, I am just super excited to see everyone, eat some good meals- prepared with good ole fashion sweat and love, and just BE for a few days. 

Fair 2009 pics.

From Fair 2009

MMH update!

Free digital scrapbooking design made with Smilebox

Rockies took 2 out of 3 from Padres this weekend

This was at Sunday's game against the Padres, which we ended up blowing in the 7th but still took two out of three for the series.  K had to work but I was invited by a girl I had met out here through AB, who also went with us.  We missed K for sure but enjoyed the game.  It was SO hot until a typical afternoon thunder shower in the 6th.  D, the landlord/friend, was also at the game and had sweet seats in the Table Mountain Ranch restaurant so we met him just in time for the rain and watched the final few innings in style! 

July 4th was K's only day off for the "holiday" weekend so we hung close to the house.  Finally checked out the Belmar Farmer's Market and had a few Bloody's at Baker before going home for our veggie-grillfest.  We did grilled zucchini stuffed w/goat cheese, stuffed jalapenos, veggie skewers and corn.  Honestly, we didn't really miss the meat and were plenty full . . . though of course had room for WholeFoods' bread pudding AND strawberry shortcake! 

Since we've gone veggie, I've been to two Rockies games (which is of course the quintessential place for a Rockie-dog) and also had to endure my coworkers ordering up some gourmet hotdogs from Biker Jim's Dogs food cart outside the building . . . Oh and I attended a BBQ in celebration of a friend of K's recent nuptials complete with grilled chicken, burgers and brats.  So far, no meat and so far, no weight lost for me that is.  Of course K can't get his belt tight enough.  Typical! 

We're so excited about our upcoming trip home and are pretty much just talking about that 24/7.  Other than unnecessary yet expected family tension, we couldn't be happier to finally get to visit Mississippi- even if it is the hottest week of the year! 

Fwd: Hanging out by the pool!

Haha

Ready to visit Mississippi

First let me say that I have received at least four, maybe five separate compliments from people I work with about how they like my voice!  Ha.  I mean seriously, how funny is that.  I can't stand my voice, especially to hear it on a recording . . . which must be what it sounds like right??  Anyway, at various times different people have asked where is my accent from, or "your voice is the one I most like to overhear"  SERIOUSLY.  That was said to me- twice!!  Those that know me best get the irony of this, which is my exact reason for boasting about it now.  Oh, and someone even said I'm soft spoken . . . well, I guess I am a low talker but it's never been said so politely/complimentary to me.  Anyway!

I guess now that we have definite plans to be back in Mississippi (FINALLY) July 25-Aug 4 (K comes back for work on the 31st though), I am getting so super excited to see my friends and family.  I think I have, well clearly, I have had to suppress missing them thoughts, etc. and now I'm just so excited.  Plus, everyday since we booked our flights K and I have talked about FOOD that we'll eat while we're at the Fair.  OMG, mouth watering now already.  Oh, and to top it off we've decided (why, I'm not sure) to not eat meat the month of July (well, excluding the last week when we're home).  Not necessarily vegetarian because we'll still eat eggs and I don't even know all the vegetarian rules anyway but we're just "not eating meat" starting today!  K of course plans on gorging himself once we get to the Fair, and I'm starting to feel like I might be inclined to as well, especially the more I think about all the goodies that will be there . . . fresh veggies, fried green tomatoes, home grown tomato sandwiches, mom's brisket, mom's tacos, steak night, late night fajitas at the Mc. cabin, P.M's afternoon appetizers, and that's not even "fair food" from the Midway! 

At first I was just stressing about how we would get home, booking the flights, etc.  (Let me say, unless you book 2/3 months in advance getting from Denver to Mississippi is complicated, but I would venture to say that flying from anywhere to Mississippi is complicated  . . . except maybe Texas.)  Plus, of course, the inevitable stress of just family crap- gosh I wish they'd just be happy to see us and let all the silly small stuff go - surely . . .     Either way, I am not going to think about any of that anymore and just let myself be excited.  I know there will be lots of friends and family excited to see us and those that want to rain on the parade are just one less person we'll have to visit with.  Seeing M.P. light up will be enough for me anyway- and of course, holding my new niece. 

Panic @ Red Rocks 6/26

Really enjoyed my first Panic show at Red Rocks. We only went on Sunday, thinking it would be a pretty mellow show . . . not so much! They jammed pretty hard, according to K.

We met some nice people and even got in with some guys that had flown in from Chicago. K ended up helping them put their tarp down and running in to claim us some pretty awesome seats. Row 16, even with the sound board- Schools side (which is apparently how your supposed to describe your seating, in relation to the band member's side - as I quickly picked up on). Anyway, part of his crew didn't make it out in time to get at the front of the line and so K helped him out. We had gotten to Red Rocks early, just to hang out and enjoy the morning but there were already a few easy-ups and several people in line even though they didn't let you into the amphitheater until closer to 2:00 p.m. - Die Hards! We put our chairs in line and figured, why not get a good seat. People literally run up that ramp and if you've ever been to Red Rocks, you know that's no easy jog. Since I also had a bracelet, I went on in as well carrying our load- which was a haul too! Either way, Panic came on about 4:30 and sounded great. We actually ended up sitting next to a guy that had moved out from Kansas City just a couple months ago and was right close to us in Lawson Hill last weekend for Telluride. How cool!

Here's the set list:

06/27/10 Red Rocks, Morrison, CO
1: Let's Get Down To Business, Little Kin, Disco > All Time Low > Little Lilly > St. Louis > Blight, Tickle The Truth > Big Wooly Mammoth > Stop Go > Who Do You Belong To

2: Postcard, Jaded Tourist > Impossible > Machine > Barstools > Dyin' Man* > Drums* > Maggot Brain ** > Use Me**, Chainsaw City**

E: It Ain't No Use > Papas Home, Last Dance***

* with DJ Logic, ** with Eric McFadden on Guitar, *** with Paul Agostino on stand up piano
[First 'Jaded Tourist'; Maggot Brain with spoken word intro by Dave - OK, so are you going to miss a Sunday show EVER AGAIN?! THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT!]